Kids Are Bad For Your Health.


I’d dare say there is a significant amount of danger upon entering my house these days.  Those without children should probably just stay away .  Actually, four out of five doctors and therapist would probably recommend avoiding visiting my house at all.

Once in a while, I actually get visitors.  I have come to realize, disclaimers are necessary before making oneself comfortable though.  Let me give you the run down on things any guest should be aware of before visiting.


If you don’t break an ankle slipping on one of the invisible-in-plain-sight Legos or matchbox cars on the floor, you are at least certain to stub a toe on the gaps between the pergo flooring in the living room.  Prepare for it.  My kids astounding ability to overload your senses is so perfected, even the wooden floor is cracking up.

I’d recommend standing over sitting.  Apparently, adults sitting down start to resemble a jungle gym…

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